


Every Golden Light Hides a Shadow

by nerdmeetslife



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Might end happily, Pain, Read at Own Risk, Seriously it hurts, You do this to yourself, sorry - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-01
Updated: 2017-04-14
Packaged: 2018-05-30 10:42:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6420634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nerdmeetslife/pseuds/nerdmeetslife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chat Noir gets akumatized, but it isn't that simple. Something happens to his real personality as a tramatic effect. Marinette is his only hope of being saved but he has her locked up, with no hope to escape without Tikki!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in the fiction, all rights to the owners. Blah blah blah- all the usual stuffz.

 

Marinette sat disheveled in the cell, here eyes blank and emotionless. No matter how hard she tried she was just a girl and those steel bars were not something easy to break, especially since they were made of such fine quality. Her clothes were tattered and she had no idea how long she had been in there. More that just a few days. She was no longer Ladybug, she wasn't even Marinette anymore. She was a doll that barely had an existence. The fire in her soul was extinguished just like Tikki. The door at the top of the steep stair case squeaked and quickly shut behind the shadow. The person came into the sunlight that peaked from the opposite side of the room. Adrien Agreste. No, she refused to accept this person as Adrien. His hair was black and his eyes were hard, and stern. Unlike they had ever been before.  
He was akumatized by Hawk Moth while he was still Chat Noir. It was the first time Ladybug had to fight two people who were akumatized at once, in fact she didn't know Hawk Moth could do that. She simple thought her black cat had dyed his hair to match his name, or something like that. She did not expect him to rip her Miraculous off of her in the middle of battle like that. But, something snapped in Chat Noir while he was an akuma... or maybe something happened to Hawk Moth, she couldn't figure it out. Hawk Moth wanted the Miraculous but Chat Noir threw them on the ground and stomped them. Marinette heard Tikki scream in agony as the Miraculous shattered. The other akumatized civilian suddenly lost their akuma and Chat Noir grabbed the sobbing Marinette and ran off with her. She was thrown into a prison-like cell, but she had been too busy fighting to realize where he had taken her.  
“Chat Noir! Why! No... Hawk Moth!” She sobbed against the bars. A flash a green entered her sight and she knew Chat transformed back to himself. She looked up to see the face of who killed Tikki. Tikki must have been dead, Marinette thought. There was no other alternative that she could think of. Her sobbing halted from pure shock when she saw the face behind the mask. Adrien Agrests, but his hair was now black, but his face was the same. Next to him a Kwami that resembled a black cat floated, looking as shocked as she was.  
“Adrein! What's wrong with the!” The Kwami shouted, not sure of what had happened.  
“What's wrong bug-a-boo?” the familiar voice questioned, but his face completely blank. Not like the soft expression Adrien often wore, or the gleeful smile Chat always had. Though the face was the same the person himself was now. Was he still akumatized? This was far too drastic for something of that sort... Marinette couldn't bare it and screamed for him to tell her what had happened. He didn't answer, just watched as she shook the steel bars that showed no sign of giving way.  
“Adrien! Answer me!” she screamed. The kawmi also tried to get answers but all they achieved was putting an annoyed face on Adrien.  
“Plagg! Shut up!” He shouted and grabbed the kwami roughly. “I'll be back... Marinette.”  
That had been several days ago and she still received no answers. She was sure that Adrien had not been going to school because he made sure to visit her everyday, several times a day. He would bring her meals and tell her stories. She quickly became broken with this development. He refused to answer any of her questions. Why was he doing this? Are her parents okay? Are people searching for her? How long is he going to confine her?  
“Why do you do this?” he asked, much to her confusion. “Every time I hear your voice you only ask questions. Mostly about other people. You used to like me so much!” Tears streamed down his face as he became hysterical. “WHY IS THE ME RIGHT NOW NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU!” He grabbed her wrists through the bars as he screamed. She couldn't respond, just what had happened to him. An akuma could not make him this psychotic, usually people akumatized had a purpose but Adrien seemed to have none. Besides confining Marinette he did nothing else.  
“Are you okay?” Marinette finally spoke.  
“Me? You finally want to know about me?” he grabbed her chin and kissed her gently through the gap between the bars. “You should've done this in the first place. Only think about me. Only love me. No one else, you don't need anyone else. EVER.” he giggled a little bit and released her. “Oh, I see. It is pretty dull in here.... I shouldn't leave you like this should I? A TV maybe? Books? What would you like Marinette?”  
“A TV!” she replied. Then she could get information about the outside world. He looked a little alarmed at her eager answer but let it pass. He left on a quest for entertainment. If she responded the way her wanted he gave in a little to her, but how far would she have to go? It didn't take him long to return. He stumbled as he carried the medium size, flat screen TV down the stairs. He walked to the far end of the cell.  
“Here.” He pointed, his voice very authoritative. He had a pair a handcuffs. “I can't have you try anything stupid.” he stated. She complied and let him handcuff her to the bar. He set the TV in the room, with an orange extension cord attached. There was an outlet outside of the cell that it could be attached to. “Oh.. Marinette.” He quietly stepped over to her, his eyes shone with a weird sparkle. “I have been longing to touch you.” He stroked her face and tilted her head like he was about to kiss her again. “I really shouldn't have been surprised that you were ladybug. Your eyes are so gorgeous.” He traced his fingers of his left hand down her side. “And your body is the same too. Though that spandex was so revealing I wonder what it looks like beneath it too.”  
“NO!” she slapped his hand away frightened. “Don't touch me with the same hands that did that to Tikki!”  
“Tsk.” He slammed the bared door behind him with a click. “Disobedient” he muttered as he unlocked her handcuffs.  
The first channel Marinette checked was the local news. After just a few minutes she saw a missing notice for her. She teared up as she saw her parents crying, pleading for her safe return. It was also all over the news that she was Ladybug, the news cameras captured that exact moment and aired it live. When she finally escaped she would have that joy to deal with.... not like she could ever be Ladybug again. Tikki... Her poor friend... It seemed like she spent the last few days crying, she was surprised that she wasn't out of tears yet.  
“Tikki isn't dead yet.” Plagg whispered. Marinette spun around, scared at the random voice. “Shhh” he warned.  
“Adrien's kwami... Plagg? What do you mean Tikki isn't dead? And how can I trust you?” She tried to keep her voice down.  
“Shhh I don't have long. Adrien is taking a shower. Something is wrong, deeply wrong... I think the akuma polluted his heart. Anyway I don't have time for that! Kwami can't die that easily, I'm sure she will be revived... we just have to wait. I have to go now!” He disappeared through the wall after he gave his brief, broken explanation. So Tikki was alive! She smiled to herself a little, that bit of news glued her heard back together, but the cracks remained. Could Adrien be saved? They just had to clean him of the pollution right? Also assuming Plagg was able to get here and leave in the time-span of a shower, even that of an idol, she must be on the Agreste residence. Now she just needed to know how to save Adrien. But that outburst of his from before. Could this Adrien be the deepest darkest parts of Adrien personified? That thought hurt her deeply as she thought of how much that boy must have suffered in silence. She had to rely on Master Fu and Wayzz to rescue her, even in his old age.  
“Why are you pacing like that?” Adrien asked as he walked in on her, deep in thought.  
“I-I just need to exercise, Adrien!”  
“You finally called my name!” He blushed slightly and touched his head. She noticed he had a huge bag to accompany him.  
“What's that?”  
“Ah!” He dumped the bag out to reveal a sleeping bags, pillows, and blankets. “Sleepover.” he stated and pushed some of it through the bars. That night he had insisted sleeping while holding hands, and she had complied due to the new information and speculations. She couldn't deny this part of Adrien. She didn't sleep right away though, she watched Adrien's sleeping face. His hair changed back to the gorgeous blonde it was before in the matter of seconds once he was asleep. It was possible to save him.  
“Adrien.” She called out teary eyed. “It's really you.”  
“I'm sorry Bug-a-boo. I'm sorry, Marinette.” He called out in his sleep, his eyebrows scrunched together. He squeezed her hand harder, like a child having a cruel nightmare.  
“Please save him, Marinette.” Plagg whispered from behind Adrien. “Please.”


	2. Split Personality

Adrien woke up and his hair instantly turned black. Marinette had been watching his sleeping face all night, making sure she captured his regular radiance while she could. He blinked his eyes a few times before locking her in his sight. Their eyes maintained contact for a while before he uttered her name and she composed herself. She pulled her hand out of his, his face dropping at the action.  
“You do not look well.” His cold voice stated as he sat up. “Did you not sleep? Because of me?” He looked hurt. This new Adrien was always moody, hurt, and scared. But she could see now that this was in fact Adrien. Well an extreme personification of his hidden emotions. She had concluded that since Chat Noir was so in love with Ladybug that when he turned on her this personality surfaced. In fact it could be viewed as he killed Ladybug, since she couldn't become the superhero without Tikki. Would Tikki be able to find her once she was healed, or would there have to be a signal of sorts. Plagg wouldn't be able to help since he was plastered to Adrien's side. Plagg pretended to sleep so that Adrien would hopefully leave him when he left, and the plan was a success. Marinette grabbed the black kwami and shut herself into the small little toilet room, afraid of being seen.  
“What now?” she whispered.  
“You act like I know! We just have to wait.”  
“You obviously know, since you know to wait.” she shook the cat kwami lightly as he looked guilty.  
“You can say... that it is my fault... not the akuma.” his ears drooped as he teared up. “I am a black cat. Black cats are cursed you see? Ladybugs have good luck, black cats have bad luck. They balance each other out. With the ladybug destroyed the balance was destroyed too, hypothetically speaking. Black cat and Ladybug are always a pair and it helps keep the balance. With the balance broken it makes it easier for the curse to be fought, or more specifically almost not exist entirely. In that moment when he crushed you miraculous the curse expanded and took over his heart. This has happened only once before, the curse taking over that is. And we couldn't save him. We just need to wait for Master Fu and Wayazz.”  
“How will they find us though?”  
“Wayazz might be able to sense our location. If not Master Fu knows that Adrien holds my miraculous and will have to use his judgment to figure it out.” After his explanation Plagg swiftly disappeared through the walls to find where Adrien was. Marinette felt sick. Was there hope of saving Adrien? To return him to normal? What would happen if she couldn't? She refused to think about it, she would save Adrien. She curled up in a ball under the soft blankets and fell asleep. Even if she was locked up Adrien still treated her right.

Adrien paced around his room. His hands held tuffs of his dark black hair as he cussed his agitation. Plagg entered through the wall and sat on his bed. There was nothing her could do but let Adrien have his tantrum, something that was common now. If Marinette did not abide by his rules he would have panic attacks. He wanted her to love him. He wanted her to listen to him and always be with him. He didn't want to control her. He didn't want to force her. But he wanted her. He didn't know what to do. He contradicted himself. He fought with himself. The real Adrien was still in there and was always fighting for dominance. He acted as the voice of reason. This was a supernatural split personality that introduced a whole new form of psychosis. After he had his freak out for about two hours he returned to where Marionette was to see he curled up into a small, defenseless ball. He quietly entered into the cell and locked the door behind him. He hid the keys inside his shirt so that she would not have easy access to them. He softly crawled next to her and wrapped his arms around her, feeling the entirety of her warmth. When he was with her his clouded eyes shined a beautiful green, which showed Plagg that there was still hope. Adrien always loved Ladybug. A very innocent boyish love. With the curse that innocent boyish love was contaminated by his desire to have her and he became psychotic. But all the same, his love had always been this great, it was just expressed differently now.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took so long for such a short update but hope this satisfies a little x$

What had caused Adrien to akumatize in the first place? Marinette couldn't think of a reason for him to get akumatized, aside from that time on Valentines day. That was different though, he was directly akumatized this time. She paced around the cell as she wracked her brain. Did she do something that day or was she un-involved. This 'pollution' seemed to be directly linked to her, but that could have also been because she was the broken link. If she could just figure out the source then it was possible that she could be able to help fix the situation without her miraculous. Plagg had told her to wait but it had already been three days since he gave her that advise. She believed that if Tikki was okay she would have reunited with her by now. Her pacing was interrupted by the loud clunk of the door at the top of the staircase. Adrien happily walked down the stairs with Plagg floating behind with a despairing look. She had not been able to meet Plagg alone after the last time and he always had a sad look plastered on his face. She scurried close to the bars as to reach him sooner. She had decided to become an obedient little pup in order to get his trust, it was the easiest way to get information. It still hurt though, to betray him. She clung to the cold bars as he got closer and called his name.  
“What's wrong?” He asked, mildly surprised. He no longer kept up the neat appearance that the model Adrien had. He looked much more like Chat Noir with his unkempt hair and comfortable clothes.  
“I was lonely... thought it would be nice to talk.” she said as she fought back the cracks in her voice. He pulled his chair in front on the bars, just close enough to touch her hand as they talked. She didn't know if it was his instincts or what but he was definitely being very cautious around her. He rubbed his thumb against the back of her hand lovingly and it gave her awkward butterflies, she wanted HER Adrien to be caring for her like this. “Can we talk? About that day?” She jumped to the point, not sure how to naturally start the conversation and trick answers out of him. His gentle caressing turned into a rough grip instantly. His green eyes grew hazy as he looked up at her.  
“What do you mean?” He growled as he stood.  
“Well... I just.. want to know what happened. What upset you so much to lead to this?” Marinette's posture shrunk as he intimidated her. His face grew dark and twisted as he contemplated his answer. What made the situation more frightening was when a sinister smile spread across his face. He cocked his head to the side before he thrust his arms through the bars. He grabbed her in a painful hug against the metal. She gasped and fought against it out of confusion but that only succeeded in making his grip stronger.   
“So you do care?” He chuckled in her ear. His hot breath caught her off guard and ended her thrashing. “Why do you care?” He suddenly violently pushed her away and she fell against the hard floor. His smile was still painted on his face, she had never seen such a scary expression. She shivered as he looked down at her. “Answer me. Why-Do-You-Care?” Plagg tried to calm the angered boy down but almost got injured as Adrien threw his arm towards the poor kwami. He kicked the bars to 'encourage' the terrified girl to finally answer him.  
“B-b-because.. I love you.” Normally when someone confessed their love they shone a cute cherry hue, but in this situation there was a complete lack of color in Marinette's face.  
“Who do you love?” He seemed to calm down a little but his demeanor didn't change and kept her terrified. The question confused her but she felt too afraid to not answer.  
“You.” She gulped as she hoped the simple answer was satisfactory.   
“Who? What is his name?” He insisted.  
“Adrien?” she answered confused. He began to chuckle softly before breaking out into an insane laughter. Her eyes grew wide as she watched the odd display in front of her and she crawled as far back as she possibly could. Plagg was silently shushing her in the background and she gladly took the advice. Plagg probably knew more about the situation, it was too bad that Adrien seemed to have him on lock down.  
“Everyone loves Adrien! Adrien Agreste! The model. The perfect son of a powerful man. A good student. Rich, good looking, smart, and well-behaved. That is who you love right? That is what you said right?” He continued laughing as he sang his praises. “My Lady of course you love someone like that, he is perfect right?” Then his face suddenly dropped, his smile finally disappeared into a twisted, pained expression. “But you didn't love Chat Noir. I confessed so so so so so many times. But I was not good enough. Why did you have to think the fake was better than the real? Chat Noir risked his life for you so many times. Loved you so many times. Gave so much for you. But you loved a man that did nothing for you.” Adrien at some point stopped talking to Marinette and just repeated himself over and over with unfocused eyes. That was when it clicked, what she did that day.


	4. Chapter 4

It was a normal day, and though it was beautiful, there was a poor soul that had been akumatized. Who else but Ladybug and Chat Noir could take care of it? So of course the two rushed to the scene to fight against 'Bad Teachers', a college student who completely bombed a very important exam. He was too powerful though and Ladybug suffered from a small injury that only Chat Noir would have known about, since it happened beyond the view of outsiders. It now made sense why Adrien had gotten a little agitated when he saw the small cut on her cheek, of which she insisted was just a small accident that happened at home. Everyone else laughed at how clumsy she was, but Adrien seemed weird. He oddly didn't believe her story at all, and it was rare for him to be so serious.  
"What do you think about Chat Noir?" Adrien asked not long after he questioned her about the small wound on her face. She gave a simple answer, where she stated that she didn't think much of Chat Noir. Nothing special about him impacted her. Adrien looked a little sad as he responded "Okay." and dejectedly trudged away. Later that day Jule had asked her what exactly Marinette liked about Adrien, aside from the normal answers every girl would give. This was a subject she was loudly happy to address. She eagerly listed all the assets about Adrien she could think of. How handsome, kind, and smart he was among other things. It was basically just a very whimsical babble. When she turned the corner there stood Adrien propped against the wall. She gasped and awkwardly said 'hi' as she prayed he didn't hear her glorifying him with her loud voice. She was relieved when he smiled and acted normal, despite seeming a little off. She thought it was probably an off day for him, given his earlier reaction to her tiny wound.  
OOOOOOOOOO  
It finally clicked in her mind, the thing that made Adrien break like this. He must have heard her that day, giving all the praise to Adrien. That combined with her utter disregard towards Chat Noir triggered something in him. She had heard quite a few of his tangents about how 'everyone loves Adrien.' and about how 'Adrien is fake just there to please people.' He often asked her why she loved 'Adrien' instead of him, and she was finally starting to grasp it. That maybe Chat Noir was more true to the way Adrien really was, as opposed to the way he portrayed himself in school. She wanted to convey to Adrien that her love wasn't for the 'fake Adrien.' She wanted to explain to him what her love really was. But would he break more if she were to do so?  
"Adrien?" She muttered, afraid of what his response would be.  
"Yes?" He purred back, and he leaned into the bars.  
"Do you remember the first time we met?" She crawled towards him and reached her hand out.  
"I do not recall." He did not reach for her hand, he just let her arm remained stretched out. She could tell he was ready to lash out about 'Adrien' again.  
"I was really mad... because I thought you helped Chloe pick on me. But then you gave me an umbrella so I wouldn't get caught in the rain." She inched her hand a few centimeters closer to him and he finally intertwined his fingers with hers.  
"I think I do remember that... The rain was really cold." He let out a laugh, not quite bitter, yet not happy.  
"That was when I fell in love with you. I did not fall in love with a fake person, I fell in love with the person who helped me out on that rainy day." After that the room was filled with silence; he looked shocked and she was afraid to say anything beyond that. She wanted to slowly work her feelings into his heart, to return him to his proper self. Though she wanted it to, she knew the process wouldn't happen overnight. She would have to carefully calculate her words and wait for Tikki to return to her.  
A/N: Sorry, I know it took so long *cough* Half a year *cough* for such a short chapter... well you all should know by now that I write super short chapters! Anyway sometimes life gets busy so sorry that this took so long! It took a lot of effort to even make time for this short chapter, so bare with me! Thank you!


	5. Chapter 5

Adrien had gotten a little less...disturbed. He was still trapped in his akumatized state, but Marinette could see glimpses of his true self leak through once in a while in his mannerisms. He went on less tangents about 'Adrien' and started to have some normal conversations with her. Normal for the situation that is. The window of hope opened a few days ago when she had told him how she fell in love with him, that was the key. All she could do beyond that was warm him up to her and wish for there to be some success. She ultimately had to wait for Tikki, but there were steps to the entire process of saving Adrien. She had to emotionally support him before her grand finale.  
The time had finally arrived to act. Adrien was away for the night due to some family business. he didn't really tell her any of the details, but she knew one thing. It was a little too convenient to be a coincidence, Master Fu had most definitely created the situation. Wayazz floated in like a ghost with the most miraculous gift ever. He held a box that contained her beautiful spotted earrings.   
“Let's break out now Ladybug!” The little turtle kwami was in great haste as he hurried ladybug to put her earrings in.  
“I can't. Not yet.” She couldn't abandon Adrien. In a strange way she had come to love him even more with the events that had unfolded. She had seen glimpses of his weaknesses and insecurities, and as a 'hero' it was her job to save him. Wayazz tried with all his might to persuade her but had to give up as distant footsteps could be heard. Adrien was expected to be away for a few more hours, but as life goes nothing ever goes according to plan. Marinette had to think fast, she couldn't put the earrings in her ears. Even if she hid them with her hair Adrien was quite perceptive. The footsteps were getting too close for comfort as she shoved the earrings into her tongue as she reasoned it was a much less visible place. Tikki didn't even have time to talk to Marinette before she was ordered to hide behind the toilet. The only thing Marinette heard from her was 'wake up!', which made no sense at all. She wished she could have gotten a clarification of the meaning of that phrase before she condemned her beloved kwami to a rather unpleasant destination. In about a minute Adrien stood in front of the cell and held his hand out, as was their newest ritual. She held his hand back and beckoned for his other one as well, it was very important that she held both his hands captive. Maybe it was the adrenaline, but she was able to talk normally. It almost didn't seem like she shoved two large earrings into her tongue. Now that she thought of it, she was lucky. It was actually very stupid to put them there and may have been better to just put them in her ears. She talked while looking towards the ground to make sure he had no visibility of the earrings in her mouth.  
“You know Adrien, I love you. I love how you look out for your friends. How you put your life on the line for me so many times. I even love that you love me so much to hurt yourself by doing this to me. That is why, I will save you. Tikki! BUGS ON!” While she transformed she pulled Adrien into a deep kiss and jumped away. “Lucky Charm!” she shouted, not sure what she would get in such a situation. It was the most surprising object ever. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. She had performed Lucky Charm properly, yet there were no results. Did that mean there was no helping her? She suddenly felt mortified and couldn't stop the tears from forming.  
“Are you ready to wake up now, my lady?” She heard a sorrowful voice call her calmly. She looked up and saw Adrien's hair fade from black to gold. His eyes reverted back to their beautiful green hue. But most importantly, the anger and sadness that once consumed his expression had disappeared, though he still looked a bit sad behind his smile. The bars that separated them dissolved and she ran into his arms, her embrace happily retrieved in his strong hold. “Let's wake up now.” he whispered one more time before everything around them turned black as she fell unconscious. 

A/N: I finally went back and cleaned up the previous chapter. Yeah I didn't proof read before I posted it. So if you read the horrible version before I posted this new chapter... I fixed the atrocity. Hopefully this little update will be enough forgiveness for my lack of posting? //sweat drops// haha yeah I have no excuse.


End file.
